Fuming Mad

I had a project due with a partner tomorrow but at the beginning of the week she fell and injured her back. She had to go home to her parents so she could have back sugery and be driven to the hospital every day (not to mention have someone to help her as she couldn't walk).

She emailed the professor about getting an extension because there was no way we could collaborate and finish this project in time. She had no internet access at her parent's house, just phone. She relayed to me that the professor said we can either try to hammer it out together or hand in individual assignments (doing twice the work mind you) on Friday (tomorrow morning at 8:30am) but we couldn't have an extension. We decided we'd try to hammer it out together the best we could over the phone as it would be easier than all attempting the work of two people in half the time.

My partner emailed the professor again earlier today saying there was no way we could do it and if we could please have an extension. She included her doctor's note and explained the situation further (no internet access, etc). Around 11pm tonight the professor emailed me saying that I have to hand in my individual assignment tomorrow morning or be subject to penalty but my partner gets an extension. She did not explain her expectations for an individual assignment and she stressed that I was instructed from the get go to hand in an individual assignment.

However this is the first email I've received from the professor regarding the matter. Its midnight. I have an exam tomorrow. I have no idea what she wants. I can't do all of my partner's research and write both halves of the essay tonight in time for class tomorrow or study for my midterm. What the fuck. Tomorrow I'm going to have to talk to her and if she doesn't give me an extension then I have to figure out some way to appeal this (I have no idea where I'd go).

If her decision stands, I fail the course. I can't hand it in tomorrow and the next day I can hand it in is next Monday. I receive a 5% late penalty every day including the weekend until I hand it in. I would fail the assignment and therefore have to get perfect on all my other assignments and the exam in order to pass.

I'd like to remind my dear readers that I pay $500 a course essentially. (That figure is rounded down.) There is no way I'm putting up with this.

I still have to study for my midterm and wake up in 7 hours. I am FUMING mad. FUMING.

BRING IT ON WHORE!!!

Guilty! Shamelessly GUILTY!

I know what I've done is wrong and I'm so sorry. Especially to Meredith. I hope you never find out because you are going to whoop my ass.

I feel that I've let down everyone.... especially myself. But I was walking home from a shitty apartment viewing on the other side of town/15 minutes away and it was icey and wet and the wind was driving and I just needed some comfort.... *sobs*.

I tried to say no, but I just couldn't. I could see it from the street. It beckoned me. I knew I'd just feel dirty afterwards but... it called to me... it coerced me... like a merciless sirene from sea tales of old.

Look at it. That's a good inch or so of icing on the top. I'm only half way done. I feel sick and queasy but it was soooo worth it. Now I know why doves cry.

Tatiana Del Crazy

Oh Dear God.
Shoot me now. Are you ready for the crazy that is this chick? I don't think you are. I mirror every sentiment Simon makes towards this mess.




The best part of this clip is not the bouncing underneath an unflattering fabric, or Paula's generous ring giving ceremony, or even the akward Seacrest mauling..

But this shining moment where headband guy mirrors the reaction of North America as we witness this horror:

Beautiful!

Alysson has turned me onto Apartment Therapy. The best damn design website I've seen. The only thing is, they have hundreds of friggin posts a day. How am I supposed to find ANYTHING.
I think I shall just post what I love here under the label "interior design" and then I can just follow that label and see everything when the time comes to design.

Budget Friendly Wall Ideas


(I especially love the door knob coat hooks and the tree branch mug rack.)

Kitchen Upgrades for Renters

Microwave UNDER the counter! WILD!

Cover Your Switchplates with Fabric Scraps

This is awesome. I love it.

Cheerful

Look at this floofy thang. She's just cuddling in my bed with me. Occasionally biting me to break down my spirit. Her cuteness is a ploy. She is never nice. She routinely shuns Boris from the bed and physically bullies him to the point where he is a jumpy, paranoid, freak cat.

Its a drizzly night and I can't sleep. I thought I'd find comfort in my google reader. A thoughtful blogger has decided to post this video. Thanks. Now I'll sleep soundly knowing that the doom of 99% of the population is an asteroid away.



Oh god. The apocalypse. Eight degrees celsius in Ottawa in the middle of February has got to be a sign.

In other news, I desperately want to find an apartment just so I have an excuse to get my mom to help me clean my current apartment. Saaad. Seriously I have way to much stuff. I did a huge cleaning upon my return from Norway but my lack of any substantial time to devote to the task is hindering. I get halfway done cleaning my room and then have to do homework or real work or go to class or have to watch stupid Tatiana on American Idol and then my half clean room slowly gets full capacity messy again. Then I get it down to half clean again--- you see the cycle of filth. It never ends and its crushing my SOUL.

Hair Cut

I want this hairstyle again.

Rancho Linko!

Everyday I drool and stare at my blog roll taking in probably thousands of links. Most of them are boring and suck. Some of them are painfully amazing. Some of them are just plain interesting to me. I always want to find someone to send them to. To share them with. Instead I'm just going to post them here every day and add them as I find them. Some of my favourite blogs are Feministing, Snootysims, Deus Ex Malcontent, Environmental Grafitti, and The Pioneer Woman. These are just a few man. You have no idea. (P.S. Yes, I'm addicted to Perez Hilton too, even though I find him appalling.)

There are new sims 3 videos on youtube. I haven't seen them yet, but I assume because by virtue of being Maxis the content is just the same rehashed footage with 30 new seconds of talking head repeating something from a press releases. (1 & 2)

I hate stuffwhitepeoplelike because its sort of true. They totally left out clever math tattoos! (stuffwhitepeoplelike)

Smoking weed is bad for your ballsack. Seriously. I'm definetely sending this to my neighbours who feel like it is necessary three times a day. A great smell to wake up to... (AOL Health)

Looks like David Icke was right! I feel like a fool for not believing him. A FOOL! (totallylookslike)

And the coolest link of the day so far is about hurling yourself from a cliff... (Environmental Grafitti)

Whole Grain Reading Material

Adoring and loving public,
I'd like to take a second totell you that magazines are SO EFFING EXPENSIVE nowadays. I can only assume because they make less revenue as everything is online now. Please please please go out and support the print publications you love or they will become so expensive to produce that it will all just stop. I love my magazines and don't want them to be expensive, or worse, completely out of print.

Its nice to have everything online but I like having back issues to flip through. Especially because you never know when you'll be writing a project and all of a sudden you remember something relevant in National Geographic and its right there in a file under your desk.

Meredith and I keep all our magazines and journals stowed away in our little storage box ottoman foot stools. I keep all my National Geographic in a special cubby hole in my giant desk full of nooks and crannies (along with super recent issues that I like to flip through for a month or two before they get filed away in the box).

These were the magazines on my desk:

Come on dear readers,
Support print publication!
Mainly Nate Geo!

RETURN OF THE HORRIFIC HAIKU

Yes! Here comes another one! Remember when every post ended in one? Well I was just reading a paper called "When the Mother of Race is Free' and felt that Darwin was particularly sexist and was inspired. I have to go through four readings tonight for the class "Women, Race and Power" so I wouldn't be surprised if a few more feminist haiku's pop up.

Oh my dear Ovum,
Lame! You are just a sperm bin!
Patriarchy sucks!

My Obama Speech

Harold Saxon Obama speech generator presents...

My fellow Americans, today is a smelly day. You have shown the world that "hope" is not just another word for "book", and that "change" is not only something we can believe in again, but something we can actually fart.

Today we celebrate, but let there be no mistake – America faces pretty and blue challenges like never before. Our economy is long. Americans can barely afford their mortgages, let alone have enough money left over for noodles. Our healthcare system is ruffled. If your thumb is sick and you don't have insurance, you might as well call a equestrian. And America's image overseas is tarnished like a vase tower. But birthing together we can right this ship, and set a course for Ottawa.

Finally, I must thank my hairy family, my stripey campaign volunteers, but most of all, I want to thank loom operators for making this historic occasion possible. Of course, I must also thank you, President Bush, for years of breast feeding the American people. Without your artsy efforts, none of this would have been possible.

Inauguration Speech Generator

Photo Meme

Horrible horrible hotlinking ahead!

1. The age you'll be on your next birthday...


2. Your favorite color...


3. Your middle name...


4. The place you lost your virginity (or would like to lose your virginity if you haven't...)


5. A bad habit of yours...


6. Your favorite fruit or vegetable...


7. Your favorite animal...


8. The town you live in...


9. The name of a pet...


10. Your best friend's nickname...


11. Your last name...


12. The one you love..


I'm watching the roast of Bob Saget. Its hilarious.

OC Transpo Strike

I stole this from Alaina's livejournal.

Creativity and the Sims

Meredith and I had to think up a discription for a novel my sim wrote on the fly. It had to be a romance novel that involved a ship, crime, ambulances, and sorcery. This is what we came up with

CRIME CRUISE
When Celia Cockburn climbs aboard the S.S. Deltabreast she has an instant dislike for Captain Dex Ruffston. When Captain Ruffston needs her help in the investigation of her roommate's murder, occult specialist Celia is called on deck! The witch hunt brings her closer than ever to any man she has ever met. Will the Captain's steeley eyes and powerful triceps warm her witchy heart?

BREATHTAKING!

I am slightly tired so I'm going to bed but here's the current heir in my legacy (well she has a baby so technically her daughter is the current heir, but you know).

Soo Good

So Joel missed out on every "giant ass bird" related meal because he's in Norway. Now that I'm here with him I promptly made him a "giant ass bird" meal we've decided to call New ThanksChristmaKuhh.



Okay we did it together it wasn't all me. haha. Plus he did all the cleaning up after like a good boy.We used the traditional "shove in a beer can" method to cook the turkey. It was actually really really moist. Better than the turkey I cooked at the hostel on Thanksgiving. Perhaps thanks to Joel's frequent and gentle basting.


Oh god. I'm so glad this picture of me exists. Joel has much to learn of carving turkey's still.



We named it affectionately but we forget now. After we feasted Joel, for lack of a better term, desecrated the poor things body to become Psycho!Joel the Bird-Armed Man.


He's a beautiful beautiful man... That's for sure.

Happy 2009 + Weird Dream

I had a dry New Years but it was lovely. I generally always end up back at my parents for New Years because that's where I am for Christmas. (With the exception of last years wonderful Wii-fest culminating with me and Alison drunkenly exploring Kat's parent's gigantic bed.) That's why it was an absolute treat to stand on the end of the pier in Arendal and watch the fireworks go off all around me.

There were maybe a dozen different places around the inlet shooting fireworks. Joel had tons of candy in his pocket from his Xmas stocking and was constantly feeding them to me. It was colder than the Virgin Mary's vagina out there but it was lovely. Ducks were frightened slightly and the amount of sulphur in the air was considerable- but the ducks will live to quack another day and the sulphur just masked the smell of our excited farts of anticipation for the year to come. We came home and had hot chocolate and played with Captain Jack and went to bed with a warm fire going.

I hope everyone had a wonderful New Year's Eve and I hope lots of exciting things for all of us in 2009 "as 2008 mercifully draws to a close".

I totally had a weird Burn Gorman public swimming pool sex dream! On New Years! It was so alarming. What's worse is that in my dream I seemed to remember a previous time doing it with him. Like we were FwB or something. Oh god... his mouth...



There was also an active pursuit on my part. He was quite reluctant like; "Oh no, I'm not going down THAT road again!" and then slowly caved in to my seduction. Also, we were never completely naked thank god. We seemed to always have our undies on. Except for the moment of you know, penetration. EW EW EW EW EW EW EW

Sorry I had to subject that to you all. Especially in the new year.

I will end this post with a hilarious picture of Joel.

"BITCHES WANT SOME SUSHI???????"

Venice

So we're in Venice which feels a bit like 1938 except for with cell phones. Old men walk together in posses smoking pipes and dressed ridiculously well. The buildings are all ancient looking and you feel like wherever you are walking could crumble and fall into the Adriatic Sea at any moment. Its sort of a wonderful and exciting feeling actually. Visually its like what every Disney park strives to be in its "medieval" town. You can feel the history in every tiny alley that you will enivetably because lost in.

Yesterday we took off without a plan or route and decided we'd just get completely lost and wander the streets forever. This was fun until we were hungry and had to pee a few hours later. Because of there being no other tourists in most of the places we went nobody spoke English and the extent of our Italian is Buongiorno and Grazie and Alfredo.

Asking for directions is 1/5 times helfpul. Often you will be sent in some random direction because there is no logical route to anything. You sort of have to make time for getting lost at some point. We went to St. Mark's Square which was really awesome but we had to walk through the busiest and most expensive area. Once we got to the square its hugeness was a very intense feeling.






Its majesty was cheapened by all the souvenir vendors, gondola hawkers, and ROSE SELLERS! A guy who's first language was neither English or Italian walked up and tried to shove a rose into our hands. We said we didn't want to buy anything and continued to walk away but he ran after us trying to put it in our hands. We said we didn't want to buy anything and he said: "No no no!" and I asked: "You're telling me this is free?" and he was like: "YES" and shoved it in my hand. I was like: "Um, okaay..." and we akwardly walked away. He followed so closely behind us I was constantly checking my pockets and looking behind me. He started saying: "Okay, just give me a little money..." and we said: "You said it was free!" and he said: "I have no job! No money!" I took one look at his Gucci jeans and Pumas and shoved the flower back in his hands and we walked away.

The first day we walked one half of Venice and then today we walked all over the other half. From St. Mark's we walked down to the Giardini Pubblici. Joel found a bathroom and the swings and that was fun. There was this big tortoise-shell shaped swing. There was also elderly exercise equipment.

‎Indirizzo:

VENICE

More too come.
Crappy expensive internet.
















Someone almost stole the camera. No joke.




















Mario. Venice's best dressed and cleavage afficionado.

London Calling

SOOO there was some kind of mechanical failure and we had to emergency stop in Montreal overnight. They put me up in a creepy Quality Inn but whatevs. My flight left at 10:30am Montreal time and I got here around 10pm London time. It was a bit of a nightmare but I was alone and had no baggage to drop off or check so it was all good.

On the plane I sat with my Nana in 20 years but Irish. She was ancient and asked me awkward questions like: "Do you think that man will bomb us?" and stuff.

I'm in London now at the hostel. I'm so tired. We have to leave in a few hours to go to Gatwick so I'm afraid I won't see ANYTHING in London. I just had a shower and I have sent Joel out to bring me food, contact lens solution, and razors. He is so happy I'm here I'm finding it easy to make him my slave. lol. Actually, its because I'm so dead tired I can barely keep my eyeballs open

I took the tube. It was ridiculously easy. I looked into the Gap and the Gap looked into me....

Packing List

This isn't so much a meme as a comment thread from Pajiba's Dustin's Eloquent Christmas Buying Guide.

This Christmas, if money were no object, what would you buy for:

1) Your Parents
2) Your Significant Other
3) Your Child(ren)
4) Your Best Friend
-------------------------------------------------------

1. I'd get my parents a vacation place down in Puerto Vallarta or maybe a place in San Francisco for the winter. (I know it snowed there this winter, but still, it'd be beautiful).

2. Malamute Puppy! He seriously wants one of these little guys so badly. Plus it would also be a bit of a gift for me because I will get to play with it and love it and snuggle it, but it will be his job to take it out to poo in the middle of the night and feed it and train it, etc etc.

3. For children I'm going to say Annie and Meredith because they are like little sisters.
For Meredith I'd get her a really nice condo downtown where she could have everything organized to her specific way and she could also sleep whenever she wanted to and watch whatever she wanted on tv. Maybe also a sexy live in butler.
For Annie I guess I'd get her some kind of Mr. Universe pad so she'd never have to leave her room and could just live from her office chair.

4. I'd get her a full wardrobe of regency period costumes and a country house with regency period staff where she could live out her life LARPing with Laura and whenever we visit her we aren't allowed on the grounds without regency costume.