Old Woman Look At My Life

Woo! I feel slightly accomplished today for getting my to-do list done before 4pm!
This was my grocery list:

• skim milk (they were out, I got 1%)
• bread
• eggs
• feta
• spinach
• triscuits
• avocado
• Riesling

Does this grocery list mean I have no personality? I got Rosemary triscuits? Does that add some spice? My cats have cool names! I'M ONLY TWENTY AND I'M SUPER COOL DAMNIT!

Tonight is date night with Joel as we both have the evening off. We are going to make feta-spinach-turkey burgers and salad and then afterwards we're going to go to the movies. Our anniversary is looming and we are thinking about investing in the Wall-E dvd as it was the first movie we went to together... I believe we also went to Zak's and Joel got the Tex-Mex burger and I got something with guacamole.

We really need this date night. We've been both been working so much that when we are together we normally have to discuss things like work, cleaning arrangements, bills, etc and we haven't had fun for some time. I feel like a lot of it is mainly my problem because I'm so anal and he's very laissez-faire. (He isn't THIS gross, but you know...) Last night he made/attempted to make brownies and then we watched Black Books and fell asleep. It was very relaxed and I missed that casual and fun interaction that we have somehow lost while living together. I'm hoping tonight and in the future we can regain our young, happy, relaxed relationship with each other and forget the chaos that is growing up around us and influencing our moods and behaviours.

ANYWAY tomorrow is Canada Day and Meredith and I have a full day of festivities planned. Step 1) sleep in because its the holiday Step 2) get snacks and sandwiches and go sit in the park Step 3) cross the bridge and check out the Mythical Beasts exhibit at Musee Civ Step 4) buy lemonade from the giant lemon Step 5) find a good spot to chill on The Hill for fireworks.

My professor this morning announced that my 8:30am class on July 2nd has been cancelled so I'm rejoicing because I can actually stay up late. I am not going to go out drinking because its horribly expensive and it will be so busy, but I'm glad that I get sleep-in day TWO!

The Tinsel Town Cryer

I love reading gossip blogs, science blogs, and feminist blogs. Of course I read Perez but take things with a grain of salt. I often feel he is pompous and melodramatic-but I guess that is how he has built his career.

However, I'd like to take this chance to say something really important:

Hitting a man "because he is an asshole" is like hitting a woman "because she is a bitch".

I just watched Manufacturing Consent and I'm thinking about when Chomsky was attacked for allegedly supporting hate speech. I don't necessarily support the views of this blogger, but I support 100% his right to express them- however silly and overly dramatic they may be, without the threat of physical violence.

An Amanda by Any Other Name Won't Smell as Rank

One of the guys I work with at the hostel's wife, Maria, is just learning to speak English and is working at the hostel as a cleaning lady. Today she practiced English with me and said that "Amanda" was her favourite English name and then I said "Maria" was the most favourite name in the world because my grandmother, mom and sister were "Marias". Its true, Maria is a good name. Except when you are a little kid and bullies call you Maria Diarrhea! She also commented that I was happy all the time, which is flattering, but perhaps its just because I often hum and sing quietly.

P.S. When I was younger I thought the song "Rolling on the River" was "Roland on the River"... I wish it was Roland on the River.

Amanda's Daily Cup of Links

Take that mental floss!

Somebody created a twitter client or the Commodore 64! I shit you not!
(Vandenbrande)

Never... EVER... EVER google "supervolcano" because you will not sleep again.
(Wikipedia)

A kid diagnosed themselves in science class. MedicalFail!
(CNN)

If a blog falls in the internet? Does anybody make a sound? 95% of blogs are ABANDONED! Like wells children always fall in. (New York Times)

Big surprise. Kid's grades improve 40% when they are paid. (New York Post)

No big, but an 11 year old boy got an astrophysics degree. BIG WHOOP. (Wood TV)

FML!!

So my day started well. Slept in until 9ish because Joelio didn't have to go to class until later. It was nice. Then we had waffles for breakfast and listened to music and giggled and stuff. Then I did some dishes, watched Marley & Me and had lunchie poo.

Then in the afternoon I played the sims, did the floors, and took some cough syrup for my flaring bronchitis. Three and a half hours later I gently awaken covered in cats and listening to jazz (oh god) and think: "Oooh, what a good sleep!" I check my phone to catch missed calls. I sleepily putter around my house for a few minutes and then it hits me. SHIIIT! Half an hour late to class! I throw all my stuff in my bag and start briskly walking to class. (Inflamed bronchi slowed my pace, but you know, there was effort.) It's a three hour class and they break every hour so I figured I could just sneak in during the 8pm break and catch the last two hours.

They were still in lecture when I got there so I decide to go get a coke to wake up. A toonie falls and rolls under the vending machine. I spend like 10 minutes on hands and knees trying to reach for the toonie. I just left it in the end. In 10 years when they remove that vending machine, some worker is going to have a fun surprise.

The class still hasn't gone on break so I figure that they went early or are just going straight until 9pm. I open the door and its so loud that I cringe and 500 faces swing around to stare at me. I slink into a seat in the back and open my laptop praying that I remembered to mute it before shutting down. Just as my computer (silently) boots up, class goes on break. *sigh*

I go down to my professor and apologized for being late and gave him my doctors note from last week. I was still half-awake and slightly upset so he just laughed at me and told me they were watching a movie so I could just go home and download it.

I can't find any pictures representing how awkward this evening was so I am simply posting a close up picture of this morning's Boris picture which showcases his awkward overbite fang.

P.S. I know everyone thinks that I'm a crazy cat lady, but my boyfriend and I are actually a crazy cat couple. He routinely yells: "AMANDA! GET THE CAMERA! THE CATS ARE DOING SOMETHING CUUUTE!" For this reason, I have a folder on my computer called Cats in Window Sill.

Calling Bullshit

To deem something "impossible" means you are aware of the parameters of "possible". If you say you are aware of the parameters of "possible", I call bullshit and ignore you.

Here is a picture of my cat:

House Husbands!

Oh Dear. I often feel overwhelmed with housework and take this out on my househusband (boyfriend). This morning he opened up, tears were shed, and I had to explain why I act like a "mean drill instructor". ("I always plan to pick the plates up off the couch! I swear!") I cut the guy a break because I love him and it pains me to see his big man tears. But also because he really honestly tries.

A friend related a story to me that put my boy into perspective. After much goading for him to clean the bathroom, this boy gets to it and rolls up his sleeves. My friend was passing the bathroom and saw him drop some cleaner into the toilet and slosh it around... and then he proceeded to scrub the outside of the toilet WITH THE TOILET BRUSH! Not just the rim and seat but the FLUSHY and the TOP OF THE TOILET! When she expressed her horror and ran for the Lysol he felt attacked... "I never do things right!" he cried. She had to explain to him, like a child. I imagine it went like this:

"You would never stick your hand in the toilet! Its diirtty! DIIIRTY Your pees and poos go in there, Sweetie! Then you put that icky poo water on the dirty brush and then put dirty brush doused in poo water on the handle that you TOUCH and where you put your BUM! No! Dirty!"

How men do not drop dead from dysentery we'll never know.

Laundro-FUN

Hi y’all! It behoves me to inform you that I am at the Laundromat. I thought, hmm, what better place to write from!? I’m stuck here for at least an hour with nothing but my thoughts and about a dozen washing machines. The laundry was getting a little ridiculous and the amount of hand washing I was doing indicated it was time to actually buy a roll of loonies and get it all done. Joel has this oversized duffel bag that converts to a backpack. It holds EVERYTHING (besides towels, that’s another day). I’m thinking today I will do clothes and tomorrow I’ll do towels and linens. (I have two mornings off and don’t work until 4pm).

The small European woman was very shocked at my appearance. I’m wearing polka dot tights (only knee length) and a green plaid summer dress- but on my back I have this giant black mass. I essentially look like a giant Beetle walking down the sidewalk. “Why you do so much laundry!!” she demanded. I felt silly and embarrassed that I had left my laundry this long. I, ever quick on my feet, said that I have a roommate who pays me to do their laundry too. She seemed satisfied with that. I will have to keep up with this lie for the rest of my life as long as I know the Laundromat Lady. I think eventually in my “story” this other roommate will move out. (I would say it’s Joel but I had no boy clothes in my bag). Oh the tangled web of lies I spin to save myself from humiliation. Oh man, she’s making some kind of garlicky soup on a hot plate in the convenience store part. JEALOUS. When I got here, I realized I forgot my soap. (As I write, it is sitting out in little perfectly portioned hotel shampoo bottles on my coffee table. I thought I was so clever...); luckily there is the store in the back of the Laundromat. For two of those tide soaps (I split them in half) and a coke it was $3.15. Hmm... My father is deathly allergic to Tide soap so I will just have to never speak to him again. This is upsetting. We like to fail at fishing together and watch McHale’s Navy.

Let me paint you a scene: Wood panelling and drywall... Lime green and yellow floral print chairs, wooden benches and TONS of plants. The Maytags look fairly recent (some even take LOONIES) but the washers are ANCIENT looking. They are built into the wall so it’s safe to assume they’ve been here as long as this building. I’m going to attempt to paparazzo a cell phone picture without arousing suspicion, but the old lady is sneaky... I’ll have to think of a new lie to save myself from having to explain blogs and the internet. I just put in my dryer loads. They only take quarters... how long ago were loonies introduced? These dryers are at least before then. They are silent and efficient killers.

I’m typing up this blog in a word document because a) it looks like I’m working, b) it spell/grammar checks for me and c) because the stolen internet here is crap. AIM and MSN are working but browsing is at a slow crawl. Nobody is online either so its not like its a huge loss. Besides writing, I’m editing pictures of my cats (sigh) and taking in the blast from the past that is this Laundromat.

P.S. There is 100 points and a cookie for Ottawans who can correctly identify this specific Laundromat.

Some Sad and Some Funny

David Carradine hanged himself. I am so shocked. I was going to post a lighthearted bit about my Star Trek waffles, but that all seems so silly now.

Perhaps I will still post about the Star Trek waffles because even when sad stuff happens, you have to keep on laughing. Plus, its not like he was my dad or anything. He's someone's dad, but not mine. Someone somewhere is probably going to blog about Star Trek waffles today and it may as well be me.


"Damnit Jim! I'm a doctor not a WAFFLE!"


Oh Scotty... he got a little scorched too. He was light and fluffy though. Just as you'd expect him to be.

Mucus Rising

Hello one and all!
I break my radio silence again today to tell you that my bronchisauri are inflamed. (I have bronchitis.) Joel is still living with me which is kind of up and down, but mainly up since he's found work. Not GIS stuff but working in a couple of restaurants. Him being home 24/7 and moping around was driving me nuts. Now that he has a job I hope he will find his own place. I doubt it though. He has no plan, he's all over the place. Sometimes he says he wants to stay here for the summer and sometimes he says he wants to go to Alaska... I don't know what's going on with him, but now that he's out of the house I don't really interact with him that much.

Sometimes I wonder if Disney has programmed me to expect the Beast to turn into a Prince just because I'm patient and loving.

I got a raise at work which is lovely, but I've been sick/away for a substantial amount of time since the raise. I have a big test tomorrow and I've not really been able to lift my head off the pillow today. I am emailing my prof to see what my options are. I doubt anything can be done this late, but I really didn't expect to be hit this hard.

So today I need to study study study (my test isn't until 7pm tomorrow night) and then I need to clean the kitchen and bathroom. I miss Meredith and splitting chores 50/50. If Joel moves out I totally want Annie to come spend a week or two with me. We can eat on patios and bake and have picnics and do DIY projects... do sister things.

Well, I just took some dimetane-expectorant and I feel I'll be mildly drowsy soon so that's enough of an update for now... Here are some cat pictures: